The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
How does one acquire holy water?
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.