Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
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at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages