In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
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So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
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Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.