My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?