Texts From Last Night

Last Night in Virginia (540)

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  The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace

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  (540): The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace http://tfl.nu/i9ng
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  i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.

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  (540): i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low. http://tfl.nu/0dri
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  she looked like the before picture.

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  (540): she looked like the before picture. http://tfl.nu/zq32
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  the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.

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  (540): the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years. http://tfl.nu/vthp
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  woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft

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  (540): woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft http://tfl.nu/ob1j
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  david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n

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  (540): david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n http://tfl.nu/9r0h
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  i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!

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  a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.

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  That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.

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  (540): i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater! (804): a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf. (804): That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit. http://tfl.nu/wspf
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  I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf

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  (540): I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf http://tfl.nu/8zma
  Replies (31) Good night (2532) Bad night (444)
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  This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.

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  (540): This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster. http://tfl.nu/5per
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  she says it's "been amazing lately"

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  i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half

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  (540): she says it's "been amazing lately" (540): i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half http://tfl.nu/wgvp
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  Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower

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  She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task

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  (540): Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower (571): She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task http://tfl.nu/xi7t
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  I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus

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  (540): I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus http://tfl.nu/qqxc
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  ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.

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  (540): ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret. http://tfl.nu/thv3
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  Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head

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  (540): Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head http://tfl.nu/ec63
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  My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard

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  (540): My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard http://tfl.nu/v78z
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