hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
The 21 Worst Ways People Have Been Dumped
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
19 People Confess The Worst Things They Have Been Accused Of
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....