After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.