So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops