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I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
accomplished twins. life is a go
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
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