i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
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looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
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We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?