the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Your dad touched me again.
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
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Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.