Texts From Last Night

Last Night in West Virginia (304)

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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.

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  (304): I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great. http://tfl.nu/mw4a
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this

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  (304): enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this http://tfl.nu/89bx
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower

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  (304): I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower http://tfl.nu/7nvc
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun

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  (304): hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun http://tfl.nu/jcw4
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?

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  (304): well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out? http://tfl.nu/ogsn
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot

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  (304): yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot http://tfl.nu/grz5
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference

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  (304): she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference http://tfl.nu/95t7
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.

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  (304): Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling. http://tfl.nu/ly52
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.

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  (304): No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me. http://tfl.nu/xahh
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.

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  (304): Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better. http://tfl.nu/8g47
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores

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  (304): nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores http://tfl.nu/a1sm
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.

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  (304): Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad. http://tfl.nu/m6pm
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  sorry

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  why?

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  oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?

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  (301): sorry (304): why? (301): oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you? http://tfl.nu/0491
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather

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  (304): You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather http://tfl.nu/giov
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.

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  (304): just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter. http://tfl.nu/doob
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