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At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
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