since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
19 Cringe-worthy Bachelorette Party Texts
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon