what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.