Texts From Last Night · drunkcrunk's Favorites

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drunkcrunk's Favorites Texts:

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.

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(360): View more from Washington

thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking

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(305): View more from Florida

i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.

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(903): View more from Texas

Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat

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(903): View more from Texas

Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?

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(901): View more from Tennessee

Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?

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(847): View more from Illinois

I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.

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