I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?
you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."