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Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
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