Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
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Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
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I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.