These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
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Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
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Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.