People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
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So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
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Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.