You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.