He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
19 Confessions From A Dude With A Micropenis
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
17 Exes Admit Why They Were Crazy In Their Past Relationship
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?