FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
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Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Found the puke drawer
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
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I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.