He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
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I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
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um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this