There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.