You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.