I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table