His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz