I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches