I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.