Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"