Texts From Last Night

Last Night in New York (631)

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  I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?

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  (631): I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend? http://tfl.nu/hi71
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  She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.

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  (631): She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink. http://tfl.nu/f50x
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  Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?

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  lol... you weighed it?

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  (631): Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night? (516): lol... you weighed it? http://tfl.nu/fdcm
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  We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.

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  (631): We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata. http://tfl.nu/hydj
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  In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.

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  (631): In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out. http://tfl.nu/wzbc
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  does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?

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  (631): does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you? http://tfl.nu/fswy
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  On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world

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  It's like a tribute to you being a slut

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  (631): On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world (1-631): It's like a tribute to you being a slut http://tfl.nu/t5j2
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  Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.

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  (631): Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments. http://tfl.nu/sneo
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  I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.

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  (631): I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis. http://tfl.nu/wmkv
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  Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.

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  (631): Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl. http://tfl.nu/065k
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  if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org

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  .org?

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  yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.

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  (631): if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org (516): .org? (631): yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night. http://tfl.nu/4hpr
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  Crying in the liquor store is not a good look

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  (631): Crying in the liquor store is not a good look http://tfl.nu/r8cz
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  Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.

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  (631): Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions. http://tfl.nu/8mk0
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  Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right

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  Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15

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  hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos

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  (585): Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right (631): Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15 (585): hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos http://tfl.nu/8bsi
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  ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight

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  (631): ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight http://tfl.nu/dytu
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