I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie