No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it