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It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
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