Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you