Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?