She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"