Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Woman Using Lunch Break To Find Another Job Gets Hilariously Snitched On By The Local News
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
28 ‘Thanks For Coming To My Ted Talk Tweets’ Funnier And More Informative Than An Actual Ted Talk
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person