Texts From Last Night

Last Night in Florida (850)

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  (850): View more from Florida

  Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.

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  (850): Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am. http://tfl.nu/2bm2
  Replies (9) Good night (1749) Bad night (584) Order T-Shirt
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  I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish

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  (850): I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish http://tfl.nu/yd4k
  Replies (6) Good night (2051) Bad night (859) Order T-Shirt
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  i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend

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  (850): i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend http://tfl.nu/u4us
  Replies (46) Good night (3867) Bad night (2543) Order T-Shirt
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  There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here

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  (850): There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here http://tfl.nu/c3ng
  Replies (14) Good night (2060) Bad night (588) Order T-Shirt
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  The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.

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  (850): The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight. http://tfl.nu/6ch9
  Replies (47) Good night (1538) Bad night (6659) Order T-Shirt
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  When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?

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  (850): When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember? http://tfl.nu/i061
  Replies (5) Good night (2489) Bad night (670)
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  And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.

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  (850): And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will. http://tfl.nu/iz1b
  Replies (18) Good night (2830) Bad night (655) Order T-Shirt
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  Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.

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  (850): Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes. http://tfl.nu/ng3j
  Replies (4) Good night (2649) Bad night (500) Order T-Shirt
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  What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?

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  Her vagina devoured it.

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  (850): What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"? (1-850): Her vagina devoured it. http://tfl.nu/yu5p
  Replies (8) Good night (4712) Bad night (867) Order T-Shirt
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  why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?

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  (850): why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream? http://tfl.nu/judd
  Replies (7) Good night (3263) Bad night (525) Order T-Shirt
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  You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.

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  (850): You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism. http://tfl.nu/m7x4
  Replies (18) Good night (5394) Bad night (827) Order T-Shirt
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  she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."

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  (850): she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.." http://tfl.nu/uij4
  Replies (2) Good night (3491) Bad night (548)
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  Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3

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  (850): Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3 http://tfl.nu/b5wj
  Replies (7) Good night (3088) Bad night (477) Order T-Shirt
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  We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.

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  (850): We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival. http://tfl.nu/h8q9
  Replies (2) Good night (2368) Bad night (571) Order T-Shirt
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  I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea

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  (850): I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea http://tfl.nu/d42k
  Replies (17) Good night (5399) Bad night (690)