First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.