I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.