there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.