it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
It was confusing and full of hummus
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that