Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please