I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
21 Dirty Secrets From Bachelor/Bachelorette Parties That Have Destroyed Marriages
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I just sucked dick on a ferry
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today