Texts From Last Night

Last Night in Oklahoma (405)

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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.

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  (405): yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt. http://tfl.nu/yslp
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  Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?

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  (405): Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you? http://tfl.nu/1gun
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  SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.

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  (405): SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine. http://tfl.nu/9wmu
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  I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.

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  (405): I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities. http://tfl.nu/i4vg
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  I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.

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  (405): I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society. http://tfl.nu/cbw1
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  Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."

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  (405): Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin." http://tfl.nu/pbfg
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  VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!

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  I'm not seeing this movie with you.

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  (405): VAGINAS ASSEMBLE! (580): I'm not seeing this movie with you. http://tfl.nu/6pon
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  I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.

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  (405): I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation. http://tfl.nu/hpn0
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  Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth

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  (405): Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth http://tfl.nu/55g6
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  We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.

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  (405): We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch. http://tfl.nu/g5x2
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  You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water

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  (405): You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water http://tfl.nu/d1ur
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.

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  (405): Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped. http://tfl.nu/kn7w
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  The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.

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  (405): The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore. http://tfl.nu/c65h
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  That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??

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  (405): That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number?? http://tfl.nu/hwoq
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  Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?

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  (405): Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream? http://tfl.nu/ecpk
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