is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I still have a little drunk in my system
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried