Texts From Last Night

Last Night in Virginia (703)

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  Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.

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  (703): Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck. http://tfl.nu/9cle
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  I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car

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  (703): I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car http://tfl.nu/t9eq
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  we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.

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  (703): we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome. http://tfl.nu/tn3b
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  We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.

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  (703): We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day. http://tfl.nu/6fp1
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  Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)

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  awesome babe! drinks tonight!

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  Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.

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  (703): Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :) (540): awesome babe! drinks tonight! (703): Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck. http://tfl.nu/zccd
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  A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?

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  (703): A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall? http://tfl.nu/zs4k
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  He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.

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  (703): He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet. http://tfl.nu/muj7
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  i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels

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  (703): i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels http://tfl.nu/aed7
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  grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it

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  (703): grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it http://tfl.nu/pj49
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  I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.

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  (703): I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face. http://tfl.nu/cgkz
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  Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.

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  (703): Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out. http://tfl.nu/hcks
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  I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.

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  (703): I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup. http://tfl.nu/a2al
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  Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out

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  (703): Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out http://tfl.nu/tdl5
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  I asked her politely not to touch my dick

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  (703): I asked her politely not to touch my dick http://tfl.nu/5dz2
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  Faces of meth called, they want their look back.

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  (703): Faces of meth called, they want their look back. http://tfl.nu/3q15
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