I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
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just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
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I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.