does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.