woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...